(00:01):

Hi, I'm Corinne. After a lifetime of obesity being bullied for being the fattest kid in the class and losing and gaining weight like it was my job, I finally got my shit together and I lost 100 pounds each week. I'll teach you no bullshit weight loss advice you can use to overcome your battle with weight. I keep it simple. You'll learn how to quit eating and thinking like an asshole. You stop that and weight loss becomes easy. My goal is to help you lose weight the way you want to live your life. If you are ready to figure out weight loss, then let's go. Hello everybody. Welcome back. So today we're going to talk about how do you lose weight the last 90 days of the year, and I want to talk about this because one of the things that I've noticed as someone who's been, and only did I lose my own a hundred pounds and had years and years and years where I had to go through holidays and gain weight, that I'd worked really hard to lose break diets or just simply gain weight because I wasn't actively doing anything about my weight, and I've also helped thousands of women at this point make it through the holidays losing weight, and I wanted to talk on the podcast about it. 

(01:18):

I think every year I do a little bit of stuff about the holidays, but I've never really broken it down into detail. So the first thing I want to talk about is October through December. It doesn't matter which holidays you do or do not celebrate, I just want you to think about during those three months we have Halloween. If you are, I believe Canadian Thanksgiving is in there. I know the US Thanksgiving is in there, hanukkah's in there, Christmas is in there, new Year's is in there. There's just a lot of cultural holidays that are all being celebrated during those three months, and I just believe one, I hate to say it this way, but it is one of the hardest times of the year to lose weight and people will hear me say that and think that means I can't lose weight. Just because a period of time in your life makes it harder to lose weight doesn't make it impossible. 

(02:19):

What it really means is when you know you're running into a period of time that's harder, that means you've got to have a different strategy. You've got to have different things that are going to be good enough for you. You've got to redefine what you do because what I noticed is a lot of people after January 2nd or January 2nd hits, a lot of people are dieting. All of a sudden we're rearranging our lives. All of a sudden we're highly motivated simply because we have the new year reset that is just a psychological hack for most people. January, February and March isn't really much different than October, November and December. We are just thinking in January, it's time to do something. When we go into the holidays, you know what we're thinking? This is not the time to do something and whatever it is you approach that with, because people always tell me like, why am I so much more motivated during this time? 

(03:12):

Or why do I lose my motivation? You got to remember, motivation comes from your thinking. It is not coming from a certain time of year. So if in October, November and December your thought is it's too hard to lose weight this time of year, then you're going to come up with every reason why it's hard. Guess what? You're not going to be coming up with every little thing you could do to help yourself. You're really just focusing on all the reasons why it's going to be too hard. What switches in January, February of March is you're thinking, I got to get this done. I need to figure this out. And then when your brain is thinking that guess what? You're coming up with solutions. You're making sacrifices, you're prioritizing different. Now, that is not to say that during the holidays we have more events and things, we have some obstacles what we have to do for ever going to lose weight for the rest of your life. 

(04:14):

One key thing that you're going to have to do is you have to be able to lose weight when there are obstacles. Most people get caught in the trap of thinking, I need to wait until it's the right time. I need this perfect scenario. If you require a perfect life, the perfect situations and the right times to lose weight, you'll never keep your weight off. It is impossible for the rest of your life to not have problems. That's why so many people fail. They keep trying to lose weight only when the conditions are perfect and when life throws curve balls, when the shit hits the fan, guess what they're doing? Throwing in the towel, giving up thinking they can't lose weight during this when the answer is no, I've got to be flexible. I got to figure out how to lose weight during that time. 

(05:10):

So in the holidays to approach when we're in the last 90 days, I want y'all to think about a couple things because I'm always trying with my clients on inside the no BS program, I'm always trying to give them a perspective shift. Most people get so stuck into how they see things that when I describe it slightly different, it's like, huh, well that makes sense. Oh, well I never would've thought about it like that. And that's the problem. You can't lose weight if you don't expand how you currently think. If you keep saying, I never thought about it like that or I would never think to do that, that's because you're too locked in to what we call broke ass diet thinking instead of getting focused on thinking that will help you and you just need some perspective shifts. So one of the first things is it is very normal to think you can't lose weight during the holidays, and there's a few reasons why this happens. 

(06:08):

So for that last 90 days, number one is when we're afraid we can't do something, when we're worried that something can't happen, our brain is going to want certainty. It's going to want to know, well, if you're afraid, does that mean this definitely won't happen? Does this mean it will happen? I just need to know. And if you are allowing yourself to be worried you can't lose weight during the holidays and you don't purposely tell your brain, here are the reasons why I could. Here's what could be different this year, your brain is now forced to go to one place past experience. Now, I will just tell all of you past experience is the worst place to go to find out if you are going to be able to do something. There are lots of reasons why number one, the past doesn't repeat itself. Man repeats the past. 

(07:09):

So I think Voltaire is the one who said that one of the things we have to think about is just because something happened in the past doesn't mean you'll keep doing it. I'm a good example. I spent my entire life blowing up relationships with men. I just really thought that no man would ever love me at my size, so I was always picking the wrong ones. I would pick fights to prove that they would stick around. And when I was first married to Chris, you can ask him, I was constantly asking him, are you going to cheat on me? Do you really love me if he was late for work? I'm like, where were you? You didn't call me. I just blew everything out of proportion. And there was a lot of reasons why. I mean, one of the reasons is my dad checked out early when I was growing up and I saw how much pain and hurt my mother had over, he was her high school sweetheart. 

(08:15):

They got pregnant with me at 17. They weren't meant to be married, but they did get married and it was very painful for her. And I remember watching my mom spend her entire life with an attitude that men are harmful. They just leave you. They're not dependable, they'll cheat on you. All these kinds of things. And then when I got married, that was just what I thought. And so I would act out in our marriage to push the boundaries to see how far I could push Chris just to make sure he was going to stay. I don't do that anymore. If I was to sit and talk to y'all about my marriage, you would never hear me going back to saying, well, now I used to always push the boundaries. I used to pick fights, I used to do all this. I guess I'm just a stone throw away from that happening again. 

(09:10):

I know this is what makes sense to me. How I show up in my marriage today depends a hundred percent on how I choose to show up today for it. It is just like with food. When you are eating each day, it really doesn't have anything to do with yesterday. It has nothing to do with last year. It has nothing to do with all the failed diets and stuff. If you really want to lose weight, you have the freedom and you have the ability to choose each day to treat it as its own unique thing. It doesn't have to be about the past, but the mistake that I see people do and why they freak out during the holidays is when they're unsure if they can lose weight. When they severely doubt it, when they're like 99% believe they can't do it and there's like 1% holding out hope, they will say, but every year I gain weight and here are all the reasons why. 

(10:09):

And my first thing that I would tell you is I would just say, don't think about the past. Think about it this way in the past, that's what I've done. This year gets to be different. If I decide it's going to be different, you do get to decide that and then the decisions are just about planning how it's going to be different. It's about laying out for yourself. Here's what will be different this year. Here's what will be hard and how I'll overcome it. There's a thousand things you can do. This is why inside the nobis weight loss program, we spend an entire month called Handling the holidays. I kick it off with a half day workshop with all of my members where I take them through how do you pick a goal for a lot of people don't understand when it comes to holidays, not everybody is wanting to lose weight and you don't even know that most people go into the holidays giving up rather than if I really am like, you know what? 

(11:15):

I want to eat a lot of things I normally don't eat, and I happen to travel a lot, I happen to go to thousands of parties. I've got a social life that is just lit corin. I always have this one story where I taught this. I've been teaching this workshop since 2009, and one of the things that I have all my clients do, which you can do at home, is you make a list of every engagement you think you're going to have. So if you're going to have a company party, a neighborhood party, a friend's party, a family party, then you're going to go spend a week with your in-laws. You just have to think about maybe you're going to have one at the kid's school. You make a list of all of them. The highest I've ever had anybody give me was by a chick named Dawn, and I believe that from November and December she had nine parties that she was going to not including time with family, traveling to her parents. 

(12:16):

She didn't even count that stuff like the two or three days where they were just visiting in-laws, her parents and family to celebrate the holidays. And I have all of my clients say, okay, now for every one of those things that you can list, I want you to put it on your calendar and I want you to make it special on your calendar because then we know on those days we want to be really intentional about how you're going to plan your food. We're going to really decide what's worth it, what's not worth it, all these kinds of things. And then we're going to talk about one of the things we do in our workshop is we talk about what is going to get in the way? What's going to be hard for you? Is it going to be food pushers? Is it going to be we travel all day, so it's going to be gas stations. 

(13:03):

That's going to be hard for me. Whatever. Those things are going to be hard. You have to know those things and then you make a plan. So if you're going to go to your past, go to your past the right way. Don't go to your past to prove to yourself that you're going to fuck this year up. Go to your past to say what's been historically getting in my way, and so how do I plan differently for that this holiday season? Another reason that we kind of freak out from October through December. So we go to our past and we use that as a way to be a whole Freddy Krueger nightmare on Elm Street experience. The next thing that comes up though is I want you to think about the holidays or when you're going to be put into situations that you aren't put in as much during the year. 

(13:54):

So for a lot of us, we're not around food puts very much until the holidays and then we're going to dinners and parties and everybody wants you to drink and everybody wants you to eat and they're making special things and trying to jam it down your throat and stuff. So sometimes the holidays are harder because you're just not. You might be able to handle a food pusher every now and then, but in the holidays it's almost like you're running the gauntlet of it. And so you've got to have a way that you're going to handle food pushers. Now, one of the things that we have inside of our membership that we include in our holiday workshops and stuff is we give them a guide of 50 ways to say no to food pushers. And I'll just tell you in parentheses, you might as well put in there without being a bitch because most people have a tough time saying no to food pushers because they just assume the only way is to be a bitch and they don't want to be a bitch. 

(14:53):

They want to be liked, they want to be seen as good, they want to be amicable, they want to be pleasing. Most of us just don't want to piss people off all the time. I mean, unless you're Corinne, where I can spend 20% of my life with the thrill of pissing people off because I'm just, as my mother said, I'm just like my granny full of piss and vinegar unless you're me most people, and I'm even the same way. I want people please too. I will give you a good example. I just came back from vacation and I am sure that my friend when she hears this, Lori, please don't take this the wrong way, but it was hilarious when it happened and she's been friends and the client and now works for me since 2007. So we are in Florida and I don't drink that much anymore. 

(15:42):

I really, I never thought that this would happen, but I don't drink hardly at all and I'm about ready to just give it up except for vacations. And honestly, I don't even at home, I was actually talking to my husband about this the other day. I said, I really think I could just not drink at home anymore, even though we own a sports bar. I was like, half the time I go down there with you, I really enjoy just sitting there with you. I've really come to love the experience, but the drinking just does not settle well with menopause of mama anymore. So we're in Florida and her husband bought two bottles of the good cya and we kept, everybody was just like, oh my gosh, we've never, I mean honestly, we are all not bougie. And we were just like, we've never had the good champagne. 

(16:36):

I wonder if it even tastes different. So the first night I had a little and it was fine. Then the second night we're ready to get it back out and I kept getting offered the champagne and her husband finally said, now don't be a pusher over there. And I was like, oh no, she's fine. Blah, blah, blah. Literally my people pleaser was going off inside my head. It had nothing to do with Lori what was going on in my brain, and this is why I ended up drinking two glasses of champagne because I was like, oh, they spent their money and I don't want it to go to waste and seem ungrateful, and I coach all of you. I'm the one that is helping all of you. So if I can fall into food, push or shit, so it's not a big deal. We just have to learn that about ourselves. 

(17:31):

So when you need to think about in the holidays sometimes it's hard for us because our food pusher tendencies are large and in charge. We're going through the gauntlet of it. It's out of the norm. So it would be normal for you to struggle more during the holidays. That doesn't mean you can't lose weight though. It just means you need to be aware that this is going to happen and I need to figure out a way to show up for myself other than just eating to please. And then the last reason why the holidays tend to be hard like that last 90 days is everyone's just out of routine. Everybody loves a routine and when you're out of your routine, it's real easy to go black and white and think, well, if I can't do it this way, that means I can't do it at all. 

(18:19):

What we need, and I teach this all the time inside my membership, is you've got to know your seasons. There are some times of the year where you have more time, you have more space, you might even be more motivated, you have more energy to go all in on things. But that doesn't mean that that is the way it has to be done. It just means during these situations and these circumstances, I go 90 miles per hour or let's say 70. It's like I'm on the interstate and I'm going 70 miles per hour. The holidays for some of us is a school zone. It doesn't mean we're at a dead stop, but we better be going 15 miles per hour. We got to be a little bit more cautious. We got to slow things down. Maybe you can't, if you love the gym, you can't go work out as much as you'd like, but that doesn't mean you can't work out. 

(19:11):

You can do 10 to 15 minutes every other day at home. Is it what you want? Do you think it's as effective? All this other stuff, it's like maybe not, but that doesn't mean you throw it all away. So we have to think about when our routine is out of whack. It's also really easy for us to slip into black and white mentality and just give up. So here, if I was going to let's say, have to lose all my weight all over again, and I was actually going to start during the holidays, here is exactly what I would do. The very first thing is I would know all of my emotional eating triggers. I would be thinking through, here are the ways that I probably will emotionally eat through the holidays so that I can come up with a way to meet my emotional needs in a different way versus only allowing myself to eat. 

(20:07):

So one example of that is worrying what other people are going to think. For a lot of us, most of the year we don't worry as much. It's like we do worry what other people think, but it's not like a constant triggering process. The holidays bring that out, we worry what other people are going to think of us because we haven't seen them in a year. We worry that what people are going to think of the gifts that we give. Is it good enough we worry about what we're eating? Do other people think, oh, she shouldn't be eating that, or, oh, she must be on another diet. I just want you to think about if you think about other people's opinions, the holidays, you have to go into it knowing that's going to be a trigger that's going to get my anxiety going at an all time high versus other periods of the year. 

(20:59):

And knowing that means you've got to come up with ways that you can comfort yourself, that you can be okay with being yourself. You just have to think about those emotional things. Now inside of our program, that's exactly what we work on, but this is one of the things that you have to think of. I was starting all over again. I wouldn't be trying to find the perfect diet. I would not be cutting out foods that I loved. I wouldn't be doing any of those shenanigans. I would be making sure that I knew when I was going to be triggered to emotionally eat so I can meet my needs in a different way so that it would be a lot easier to lose weight during the holidays because I would be taking away the one thing that's making me gain weight. I may be taking those emotional eats out by actually giving myself what I need so I can feel good versus I'm just going to try to take the food away while also being a nervous fucking cat, like a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. 

(21:59):

That is one of the mistakes we make in the last 90 days of the year. It's like, well, I'm going to try to lose weight like I always do, which means I'm going to take away my emotional eating, but I'm not going to replace my emotional eating with my truest needs. I'm just going to feel like shit while taking away food, and that never works. The second thing that I would do is I would set a very intentional and specific goal around how much weight I'd want to lose, how much weight I would be willing to gain or if I wanted to maintain what that range is going to be. And I wouldn't just set goals around the number on the scale. I would think whatever number I want to hit now I've got to come up with a list of all of the behaviors that I am willing to do to get there. 

(22:49):

And if those two can't match, if you look at your list of behaviors and you think that's too much, I'll never be able to do it, then your goal also can't be achieved. So what I would do is I think, okay, ratchet the goal and figure out until I get to a happy place of if I'm doing these things, I feel like I would maintain if I'm doing these things, I feel like I could achieve this weight loss number or I would only gain, some of my clients are used to gaining 10 pounds during the holidays and for a lot of 'em they're like, as long as I'm only up like three or four pounds, I'm totally fine with that. That's not a big deal. It's when I get to 10 that it's like a whammy for me. So I would make a list of habits and behaviors I need to do and then I would make a plan for how I'm going to put those into place. 

(23:37):

But you need to make sure they line up because I watch too many people try to lose weight during the holidays doing it like they always do. They pick some sad ass diet that's too hard for them to do during the hardest time of the year, and they only give themselves that one option. And so the alternative is like, well, I just can't lose weight then. And so they don't do anything. The last thing I would do if it was me starting over because I think this is all that would need to happen in order to lose weight during the holidays, is I would make sure that I did not fuck it eat. I say this all the time to my clients. Most women are carrying around 20 to 25% of their total body weight is just fuck it eating and fuck it. Eating is when you are on or you're off or you're good or you're bad in the second you think you've not done a good job, broken a rule overate or whatever. 

(24:38):

You don't say, oh, I'm glad I caught that. I'll just stop eating now. Or I'm glad I caught that tomorrow. Here's what I can do to try to make sure this doesn't happen again. You get so hard on yourself that you are left with going into fuck it mode. Fuck it. Mode is almost always because you are taking a stick to yourself and you're beating yourself up harshly for a mistake and you end up fuck it eating, not because the food tastes so good. It's because you have to get away from yourself and fuck it. Eating gives you that. So this is the reasons why I lost weight. I worked through a lot of my emotional eating. I knew that there was no way that I was ever going to be able to lose weight and keep it off for the rest of my life if I did not address why I was emotionally eating and start giving myself what I needed. 

(25:34):

Because we all are human. We're going to have seasons where things are easier and we're going to have seasons where things are harder. And the only people that succeed long-term in weight loss are the ones who know how to get through the tough times. So if you want to lose weight during the holidays, some of the things you've got to stop doing is thinking there's perfect time thinking. There is no perfect time to lose weight. In fact, to me, the best time to lose weight is during some of the most stressful times because it forces you to take care of yourself in new ways. One of the other things is you've got to break this idea that working, trying to lose weight somehow is costing you money. I think keeping your overeating habit is what costs you the most money. We don't even realize how much extra food we're eating and how that is adding up on our grocery bills. 

(26:31):

And then I think the last thing you have to break the habit of is going at it alone. I think so many women feel like no one gets them. And I will tell you the holidays are at the peak of when women feel like they're completely alone in weight loss. Everybody else seems to be able to eat whatever they want. You just watch and everybody else enjoying themselves. You don't know what's going on in their head, but they could be sitting there just as miserable as you, but you don't know. And so you think you're the only one who's anxious. You are the only one who can't control themselves. You're the only one who gains weight when you eat what you want. I think that one of the reasons why it's so hard during the holidays is so many women are trying to get through the last 90 days of the year just trying to either lose weight on their own or they're giving up and then feeling alone. 

(27:24):

So if it was me, I would think the holidays are the perfect time to need support. You probably need other people to talk to. You probably need other people's ideas. You probably need other people's perspectives. You need a lot, and it's really hard to get that in your real life when you are the one who's struggling the most with food, with yourself, with your body, those kinds of things. So I hope this is helpful. I hope this helps you. Think about what you most want for the holidays, what you want that last 90 days of the year. Just remember the last for four years, you give up completely from October through December. That is spending one year out of your life just throwing everything away. And then you're wondering why. I don't know why every single year I gain a little bit more weight. I gain a little bit more weight because most of us, we can't spend three months in fuck it mode. 

(28:21):

We can't spend three months giving up. We need to spend those three months figuring out how to meet our needs, how to make small changes, how not to throw everything away just because you can't do all the things. So I hope this helps. I'll talk to y'all next week. Are you ready to lose weight? The no BS way? If so, good news, we are open, which means you can join us at any time for just $59 a month. If you're ready to work with me to lose weight, the no BS way, come on over to join no bs.com. Check out everything that we offer. We would love to help you lose your weight for the last damn time.