(00:01):

Hi, I'm Corinne. After a lifetime of obesity being bullied for being the fattest kid in the class and losing and gaining weight like it was my job, I finally got my shit together and I lost 100 pounds each week. I'll teach you no bullshit weight loss advice you can use to overcome your battle with weight. I keep it simple. You'll learn how to quit eating and thinking like an asshole. You stop that and weight loss becomes easy. My goal is to help you lose weight the way you want to live your life. If you are ready to figure out weight loss, then let's go. Hello everyone. So we're going to talk about how to know if you're eating too damn much today. So this'll be a really good one for y'all because this'll be helpful for people who if you hit stalls and plateaus, sometimes figuring out your enough is going to be a key to unlocking things. 

(00:57):

I will tell you if you're on a solar plateau, it doesn't always mean that you need to eat less. I think our brain likes to jump there because we have diet mentality for years and years and years. You have done diets where you are supposed to eat. Basically, the path to salvation with diets is for you to starve and as long as you're starving and miserable, you're on the right track, girl. That is not how losing weight should be. Losing weight should not be a method of madness where we are trudging through the swamps, filled with none of the food we like to eat. It's like a swamp of broccoli. It is not supposed to suck, and unfortunately though for many of you, you have done so many diets that have suck that it becomes the ecosystem for you that unless it sucks, it won't work. The only way I can lose weight is to be miserable, and I just want to say that because I think it's so important that we all recognize when we go to trying to lose weight. If you and I want you all to ask yourself what do I think weight loss is about? What is the experience about? 

(02:18):

When I think if I lose weight, it means I have to do these things. I have to feel this way. I can't do these things anymore. I should be doing these things. If y'all will write some of that down, especially for people who you desperately want to lose weight, but you find yourself sitting around not pulling the trigger, listening to things, but not actually doing it. Like a telltale sign that you have got a working definition in your brain that's miserable is if you say to yourself, I keep listening. It all makes sense. It doesn't even seem like it should be that hard, but I don't make my plan each day. 

(03:15):

I know I need to do the things, but I'm just not doing them. That is usually a red flag. You will often hear me say when someone says, I need to do the things, I'm just not doing them, and I will ask them, what are the things I like to know what someone's unconscious bias is about what they think they need to do to lose weight. And this is important because if your unconscious bias, if your unconscious thinking is in order to lose weight, well, it's just going to be really hard to eat with other people. I wouldn't even know what I would do with myself at night. I'm just going to have to miss out on things the last time. I just barely could eat all of that. If you think about it, if those are the things that are running underneath, why would you be motivated to do something? 

(04:15):

Even if it makes sense, you now have conflict and it's easier for us to, I will promise you, even no matter what I tell you about the basics and stuff, if you don't look at those unconscious biases around your weight loss and what you have to do to lose weight, you will not pick what I tell you nine times out of 10 because even if what I tell you makes sense and has a hint of truth, it's like, well, I can see that. That kind of makes sense if it's running up against, but you can't lose weight unless you're miserable. There's no way you could eat your favorite foods, but you always lose control, blah, blah, blah, whatever. It's right. You will pick that because it feels safe and it feels a hundred percent true even though it's not a hundred percent true. It feels a hundred percent true. 

(05:15):

That's why it's not always enough for people to just listen to things that I tell you about getting your enough cues dialed in and stuff. A lot of times what ends up happening is you can't pull the trigger until those things are investigated, and all we need to do is we don't need to disprove every single one before you can do something. We just need to create enough doubt and uncertainty about what you currently believe to open the door to trying else to just see if that might work. If it might be like Corinne says, it's, I'll tell you, when I lost weight, I promise all of you, there were hard parts and there were easy parts. I always thought the hard parts were going to be eating healthier, having to wait for hunger for me. You know what the hardest parts were. It had nothing to do. 

(06:31):

When I started waiting for hunger, like slight hunger, I realized it wasn't as bad as I was making it out to be, but the hard part was trying it, getting enough courage to try suspending my doubts to see if it would work. That was hard because it's scary, but actually waiting for hunger was not technically difficult and when I waited for hunger, what I noticed was it wasn't even that hard. Slight hunger was not that crazy. It was like, oh, this is all we're doing. We're waiting until we're yawning and losing focus. That's my hunger signal. Wow, you mean my hunger signal isn't chewing my arm off, laying around, writhing in misery like I used to do on Weight Watchers? 

(07:25):

To me, the hard parts of weight loss, when I look back on all of it, it was challenging my insecurities. It was listening to how I started talking, like I was talking to myself and making myself talk better whether I wanted to or not. Alright, the first thing we have to do is we have to realize that we are going to have to go through periods where we have to test our enoughness. So as you are losing weight, you will need to test your enoughness. This is not a, I figure out my enoughness on day one or month one and then for the rest of time, that's going to be the enough cues. Sometimes your cues will change as you get smaller. Your enoughness probably will change as you get smaller. It doesn't mean this is what I don't want anybody thinking that as you get smaller, you barely eat. 

(08:28):

It can feel like you're barely eating when you're used to eating. I was used to eating. I used to eat a lot, just a lot. If we ordered pizza, we got two so I could have one. If I got ice cream, I sat down with a half a gallon because I was just going to eat till it was gone or until I was miserable. If we went to a buffet, at least three plates, otherwise I didn't feel like I was getting my money's worth and I grew up that way. Now, I remember being told, get your money's worth. We don't know when we're going to eat next. So as an adult it just made sense to me. Well, it's the buffet. You should probably, if not, if you don't walk out of here with your eyes rolling back into your head and a button threatening to poke somebody's eye out when it flies off of you, you didn't do it right. 

(09:23):

When I talked to y'all earlier about those unconscious biases, I had a lot of unconscious thinking around fullness and all the things. So we have to realize is that when you're losing weight, your enoughness is going to change because your body as it gets smaller, has less energy demands. That's why it's really important for all of us to be working on what we think about food, overcoming the emotional side of eating because if you just eat according to what your body really needs, it's going to be vastly different than eating based on your bad days, based on comfort, based on relaxing, based on what everybody else is doing, based on fear of wasting based on what's being offered to you in the moment. If you clean all that stuff up, it's not as much food, but it's not so little. My goal is to teach all of you how to eat enough food that makes you physically feel amazing so that you have the energy to do your days that you feel fueled and then we sprinkle in joy and pleasure. 

(10:51):

We put all of those ingredients on top of that and then you have pretty fucking amazing food life. The problem comes when we are overly reliant on the food to be our life, to be how we cope with life. Food was never really intended to be anything but what we need to survive and then commune. Those are the two. If I was to boil it down to tell me about food. Food has two to three main purposes, and if I had to rank them in order, I've never taught this, but let me think about this. Number one would be just sustainability, literally to be alive, to have good health, to live a long time, to be able to complete and do the things you want in life. That's the number one thing. The second thing I think food's major role is communal. If you look at history, whether you believe in God or not, it doesn't really matter where your stance is religiously. 

(12:08):

If you just look at in America, we had Thanksgiving in Christianity, Jesus's last meal was a supper. There's just all these instances where you can tell human dynamics and human psychology was food is an important part of how we gather, so we want to include that too. And then the third major component of food, and this is not divided equally in thirds, but the third one would be comfort. When we are born, we come out the womb and the first thing we want to do is suck a tit. We're naked, we're cold, we're scared to death. We don't know what to do. Shove us on a titty, guess what we do? We stop crying. I still remember the only way I could calm Logan down the first probably nine months of his life, he was easily overstimulated. We didn't know he had autism back in the day, but oh my gosh, my baby definitely. 

(13:29):

It would never fail if he heard a siren and it could be 10 miles away if that child heard a siren, if something was loud, we couldn't go into loud places, nothing. He just unraveled. And of course he's a baby, so all he knows to do is scream his head off and the only thing that ever soothed him was put him on a titty. And I can remember time after time rocking him and nursing him and watching him with little tears still coming down his face and he would just pull on his ear and just comforting him himself. 

(14:08):

So the reason why I tell all of you this is because the majority of our eating is going to be for that physical need, and then we layer in communal and we layer in comfort. But when you're sprinkling that stuff on, instead of primarily I'm eating for my comfort needs. Sometimes I'm doing physical, but rarely I override that all the damn time. I don't give a damn how I feel. I'm just going to eat this way. And then we have a lot of communal eating on top where that's the only way we know how to commune with people. That's where we start figuring out there are other things we need to be doing and we need to be thinking about when it comes to food. So we have to clean up all that thinking around it, so you will need to eat less. That's why it is important to be thinking about how are you using food? Is this how you want to use food? This is why I have you plan, because planning to me is the number one way to ensure that you take into consideration physical, communal, emotional, that you get all of those in there and that you're getting them in there in the right ratios and there's no set ratio, but every day where you understand today's needs are this just like for me very often, I want to go out on Saturday nights with Chris. Well, I can't drink on Saturday nights. 

(15:52):

Why? I do a lot of calls on Sundays. That's my big workday. So when I'm planning my week, I don't plan communal eating on a Saturday, even though that's when we want to do date night. I have to figure out another way to have community, even if that means going out and not drinking and experiencing community in a new way. That's why I love for y'all to do planning so that you can take all the needs in consideration because today is a good example. I have got five hours of calls. I don't stop until three o'clock. It's like 10 to three, whatever. I don't know how many hours that is. I think that's five no breaks, and last night and yesterday I really had to prioritize food on physical need so that I would have the energy today to do what I need to do. 

(16:57):

Yesterday was not a day to comfort eat. Yesterday was not one of those pleasure eating days. Yesterday was not a communal eating day. Now sometimes you can mix those things in there and it's fine, but for me, I knew yesterday the priority had to be like, what are we eating today that makes the most sense? Knowing you have a huge day on camera tomorrow and that's how I plan to take care of my needs. For me, that is comforting. It's getting the comfort in another way other than just the food. That's why we have to think about these things more often. So you will always, if you have been eating to just clean your plate, get your money's worse because it was offered to you. You don't want to hurt people's feelings. 

(17:48):

You don't have any other way to relax. If all of that's going on, when you start eating for physical need as the primary gauge of what we're going to be doing, it's going to feel like less. It should be less and it will be less because we need to lower that food to the amount your body needs so that you can see the gap between this is physically what I need and all these emotions left over are the ones I've got to start taking care of in new ways. That's why I think weight loss is so good emotionally for us. It's because for those of us who use food emotionally, when you take away the way that you've been comforting yourself, you are forced to do one of two things. Well, first you just get super aware of like, oh gosh, this is what I've really been needing all this time. 

(18:43):

Then we have two options. We start meeting our truest deepest needs which leads to a more fulfilled, better life. That's in our control where we fix things, where we change as a person, we learn how to be better to ourselves. We learn how to talk to ourselves. We just learn how to meet our own needs. Or we go back to the eating and we're like, you know what? I just don't think I can do all that. I think I'm just going to eat and be miserable because the eating will never fulfill long-term. Those needs. It will put a bandaid on it, but when your life and your emotional needs are only met with food and you need things like compassion, a new way to talk to yourself, to believe in yourself, to try new things, to be less hard on yourself, all of that stuff, that would be like somebody taking a steel rod, jamming it through your femoral artery and you'll be like, man, who's got a Johnson and Johnson, who's got a bandaid? Now, I don't want a toe bandaid. Get me one. That's like for an elbow. That's what eating is like doing. It's like thinking that that is going to fix a femoral artery. Gouging not going to happen. 

(20:22):

You'll feel like you're doing something for it, but you're ignoring that you're getting ready to die. Then one of the things that I think is important for all of you is that when you know you're trying to get back in touch with enoughness is that you've got to recalibrate it every so often. So here's what I want you to do. I want you to start doing this, especially those of you who stall out or hit a plateau. I want you to put on your calendar, everybody pick your favorite day of the month. It could be the first, the seventh, the 12th of the month is one of my favorite days because that's my birthday, and so every month on the 12th, it's an easy number to remember. So everyone think about a number. They'd be like, this is now going to be my favorite day of the month. 

(21:18):

All right, now, whatever number you just said is now your, I'm testing my enough signals every month until I lose all my weight and then I will even do it in maintenance for at least six months, whatever day you picked. That is now testing day. And so that's the first thing we have to do is we have to have a day each month where we really are like, today's the day it's time to play the Hunger Games. I'm going to retest all my enough signals and then here's ways that you can do it. We call this one a level one. Level one is where you try to leave two bites behind at your main meals. Don't worry about it for snacks, just your main meals. Now leaving bites behind. I do want to say this, this gets misconstrued all the time. Leaving bites behind does not mean you're going to lose weight. If I went into my fridge, if I went in there right now and I made me a platter of food and I left two bites behind, but it was a fucking platter of food, that doesn't mean I'm going to lose weight. Leaving bites behind is a practice that we try for when people are afraid to stop at enough. 

(22:45):

So for some people leaving a couple of bites behind when they've just gotten used to how much they're eating helps, helps a lot. For people who think eating to enough doesn't really matter, doesn't add up, won't be enough. Leaving two bites behind and saving it in a freezer bag so that you can see how much food actually gets left behind in the matter of a week. If you leave two bites behind, what it shows you is that a little bit adds up instead of a little bit isn't good enough. It's just a hack to get you thinking differently instead of a little bit doesn't add or a little bit isn't good enough. Now we want to see like, oh, a little bit adds up and adds up pretty fast. If this is you, try leaving two bites behind, get you a Ziploc freezer bag, shove that food in the bag and put it in the freezer and just do it for a week. 

(23:52):

You will almost fill a bag full of food. It's that big of a deal, so it shows you compound effect. And then the other beautiful thing about leaving two bites behind is four people who struggle with stopping it enough because they don't like wasting food. We have to baby step our weight in sometimes to leaving food behind so that you see, oh, all of a sudden I didn't just take all the cash out of my bank account, throw kerosene on it and burn it in the backyard because I didn't need a chicken wing. Sometimes we have to see how ridiculous we're being about cleaning our plates. We are in a day and age where most of us are not like in the depression. Most of you have an iPhone. You got, I'm not saying we all rolling around like a Rockefeller up in here, but I will say this, most of us, we keep overeating with the excuse I need to clean my plate when times have changed and we are just reliving what was told to us from people who actually lived during times where it was like you really needed to not be wasting food. 

(25:10):

It was a life or death thing. Most of us are not living in a life or death situation over it. We're going to the Cheesecake Factory, polishing off our plate saying, I hate to waste food. We got to go boxes. Now you can put shit in the freezer. You can put shit in a refrigerator, and the other thing that it does is if you're afraid of wasting food and that's why you keep eating past enough, you are never going to lower your grocery bill by overeating every meal ever. How are you going to be able to recalibrate how much to cook and buy if you keep eating at max volume because you're buying and making grocery lists based on consumption? So you have to change consumption in order to know what you need to plan and buy for. That's how it works. So if you actually want to save, if you really want to save money, if you're really in it for that, then do it the way that actually makes sense. Don't overeat thinking I'm not wasting money. I'm like, what? When you overeat, that is wasting money. It just is. All right. Level two is now you start on that day that you're going to do this. You serve yourself less, so you're just going to serve yourself less, just a little bit one scoop less, a sliver, less. You're really going to, like today, I'm going to try serving myself a little less and I'm going to see if that's enough. 

(26:52):

Sometimes if you try this every month, you'll run up on a month where it's like, oh, I don't need, it's now too much. It's not enough food. So I know I need to go back to the level I was at. But some of you, when you make this slight change every month, you'll notice it only takes a few months of trying this to where I get to a really comfortable level of eating where my food is lasting me three to five hours. I'm sprinkling in pleasure and comfort and joy and community. I'm also got plenty of energy foods, and you start thinking like this pretty good deal. I can eat to enough. I'm eating foods. I like this works. This is probably why COR said this is an easy way to lose weight because I'm like meeting my own needs. I'm now meeting my emotional needs. I'm enjoying my food and I'm eating to enough. I mean, that's pretty good win and deal. If you think about it. 

(27:55):

Then there is a level three and level three is where we call it the halftime method. The halftime method. It gives you a chance to slow your eating down. That is the purpose of the halftime method. It is to make sure that you're eating slow and that you have these really simple built-in pauses to think so that you're not just eating on autopilot. So what you do with the halftime method is you make a plate, you figure out what half the plate looks like you eat and you put your fort down, and I just suggest taking a one to two minute break. You do not need long. You don't need to sit there for 10, 15 minutes, let your food go cold, all that kind of stuff. You need just enough time to get free of your immediate emotional reaction to stopping and to bring your conscious brain online. 

(29:05):

It's all you got to do. And then once you're no longer calling yourself names or just wanting to keep eating, just take a few deep breaths and say on the inside, it doesn't have to be a public display. You just say, I'm just trying to figure out if I need to keep eating or not. That's it. The goal here is to learn my enough signals and if it makes you feel better, this is what I usually tell myself. If you want to keep eating you, absolutely, but we're not going to not learn our enough signals simply because you want to keep eating. We're just going to gift ourselves this information and then we can work on figuring out why we want to keep eating. 

(29:58):

So the way that I do it, and I think the way Kathy does it is we eat half the food. We take our break, we figure out our signals, we figure out if we want to keep eating, if we like our reason. For me, a lot of times for me, I'll keep eating, especially if I'm like, let me think about the rest of the day. So if I'm doing it for lunch, well, let me say I kind of did it this morning at breakfast. So I ate breakfast this morning before I was hungry because I just wasn't hungry this morning, but a long day ahead of me, and if I waited for hunger, it probably would strike in about 10 minutes when I'm going straight into another call. It's coming up on 11 o'clock and I wouldn't be able to eat. And so I ate and I stopped for a little bit and I sat there and thought not only did I not start at hunger, but I was already feeling almost full, but I hadn't ate much, so I took a small break and I sat there for a little bit and I really thought it through and I was like, you know what? 

(31:06):

I'm going to finish this because I also know I don't want to set myself up to be hungry in the middle of a time when there will be nothing I can do about it, and I don't think that'll be good for my calls. I don't think that's good for my people. It's not good for my mood, it's not good for my energy levels, and so I finished my breakfast. 

(31:29):

That's doing doable hunger. Doable hunger is more. It's not just waiting for hunger and asking, have I had enough? Doable Hunger is about getting in touch with your deepest needs, being willing to listen to your body, listen to your day, think things through, make decisions that you're proud of, or at least make decisions that you're like, I think this is in my best interest. It's not about right or wrong. It's not about a certain amount, and this is why I tell y'all it's always going to change, and so when y'all are thinking about you're enough, because that's, to me, the hardest basic to get is enough because on the enough side is where so much of our overeating takes place. That is where, fuck it. Eating happens usually. That is where we're comfort eating. There's so many things that come up on that side. You can unwind it, but you're going to need to every month dial back in. Test those cues, make that your day that you reassess, that you look at things, that you question what you're doing enough feels like my Everest. I mean, it makes sense why it's the toughest one. It's where so much for most of us. I'll tell you, I really do believe this for women in particular. The reason why enough is so hard is because it's the only place we get a break from ourselves in the world. 

(33:23):

For a lot of you, that's the main thing. If it was just habit, if it was just because, well, my husband doesn't like it when I leave food on my plate. If that was the only thing going on, it would be real easy to fix because you would just look at your husband and you would just say like, Hey, actually I'm leaving food behind because I'm fixing to save us some money. The more food I leave behind, the more I learn how much to buy at the store. You fixing to see this grocery bill going down? How about that for wasting food, bro? But that is not why Enough is tough enough is tough. Usually because we eat past enough to get away from the harsh voice we carry inside. We eat past enough because it's the only way to relax. It's the only way we know how. 

(34:18):

It's the only break we get in the day, and so we have to find those things that enough is doing for us, make that list and then we have to get help on figuring out how do we meet those needs in new ways. Thank you so much for listening today. Make sure you head on over to no bs free course.com and sign up for my free weight loss training on what you need to know to start losing your weight right now. You'll also find lots of notes and resources from our past podcasts help you lose your weight without all the bullshit diet advice. I'll see you next week.